Post by Troglodyte Troglodyteson on Aug 20, 2015 17:03:09 GMT
So let's say a friend of yours acquires a new girlfriend and shows you a picture of said girlfriend and asks you "what do you think?". How do you respond?
If you're too complimentary they will think you're trying to steal their woman, if you don't compliment them enough they'll think you're calling them fat and ugly.
Like this one time a very violent and insane individual introduced me to his new girlfriend and asked me what I thought of her. I simply replied "Yeah she 'aight." which was met with incredible hostility.
Seriously you wouldn't believe how quickly the situation escalated, he went from "you trying to steal my byatch?" to a violent physical confrontation within seconds. At first I didn't really want to retaliate but it got to the point where he was taking swings at me with broken glass so I just had to fight back. And he's a big guy so I had to get pretty drastic with my choice of weaponry, I remember picking up a road sign at one point just to hold the crazy mofo back. And he just kept coming! It got to the point where I had to steal a car GTA style just to get away from the lunatic, I was doing like 90mph on a dual carriageway and it wasn't enough, he kept following me until I accidentally swerved into a chinese takeaway. Luckily nobody got hurt but apparently the building wasn't insured so they had to close down. Anyway the fight didn't end there, despite this deranged individual having broken his leg he STILL came after me, I couldn't even remember what this altercation was about but I had to take advantage of his physical impairment. As he took one last swing at me I ducked and shoved a shard of glass from the chinese takeaway into his other leg which swiftly brought him to his knees.
By then the police arrived and we were both arrested for drunk and disorderly behaviour (we weren't drunk, just looked that way apparently), GBH, grand theft auto and indecent exposure (the fighting was so intense our clothes were ripped to shreds and our genitals were showing).
I didn't even know the guy, he just randomly tapped me on the shoulder in the middle of the street and asked me what I thought of his girlfriend.
So anyway, after this non-made up story I've changed the way I respond to people who ask for opinions on their significant others.
If you're too complimentary they will think you're trying to steal their woman, if you don't compliment them enough they'll think you're calling them fat and ugly.
Like this one time a very violent and insane individual introduced me to his new girlfriend and asked me what I thought of her. I simply replied "Yeah she 'aight." which was met with incredible hostility.
Seriously you wouldn't believe how quickly the situation escalated, he went from "you trying to steal my byatch?" to a violent physical confrontation within seconds. At first I didn't really want to retaliate but it got to the point where he was taking swings at me with broken glass so I just had to fight back. And he's a big guy so I had to get pretty drastic with my choice of weaponry, I remember picking up a road sign at one point just to hold the crazy mofo back. And he just kept coming! It got to the point where I had to steal a car GTA style just to get away from the lunatic, I was doing like 90mph on a dual carriageway and it wasn't enough, he kept following me until I accidentally swerved into a chinese takeaway. Luckily nobody got hurt but apparently the building wasn't insured so they had to close down. Anyway the fight didn't end there, despite this deranged individual having broken his leg he STILL came after me, I couldn't even remember what this altercation was about but I had to take advantage of his physical impairment. As he took one last swing at me I ducked and shoved a shard of glass from the chinese takeaway into his other leg which swiftly brought him to his knees.
By then the police arrived and we were both arrested for drunk and disorderly behaviour (we weren't drunk, just looked that way apparently), GBH, grand theft auto and indecent exposure (the fighting was so intense our clothes were ripped to shreds and our genitals were showing).
I didn't even know the guy, he just randomly tapped me on the shoulder in the middle of the street and asked me what I thought of his girlfriend.
So anyway, after this non-made up story I've changed the way I respond to people who ask for opinions on their significant others.
